The management said they were sorry
   For the inconvenience you are suffering
   And Mr. Booking Agent, please have mercy
   Don't book the jobs so far apart
   We went up to Griffith Park
   With a fifth of Johnny Walker Red
   And smashed it on a rock and wept
   While the old couple looked on into the dark
  
   Oh, Richard, tell me if it's poker
   Oh, Richard, tell me, who's got the joker and is it poker
  
   Deuces wild, like an only child
   I'll see what you got. How much is in the pot
   You pay the tips and I'll collect the chips
   It's a full house tonight -- everybody in town is a loser
   Yeah, you bet
  
   The dealer's been dealing me bad hands
   From the bottom of the deck without the slightest blush
   And I don't know whether to call or check
   But right now I feel like I got a royal flush
   And my lady didn't show from 'Frisco
   But we had to go on with the show
   Everybody got stoned -- it was a gas, it was a smash
   Everybody got wrecked, checked. Oh, oh, oh, oh.
  
   Oh, Belfast cowboy, lay your cards on the grade
   Oh, Belfast cowboy, can you call a spade a spade
  
   Oh, Richard, tell me, is the game poker
   I can't understand who the fool is that holds this joker
   Is it poker
  
   Oh, Belfast Cowboy, lay your cards down on the table
   Oh, Belfast Cowboy, do you think you're able